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FORGIVE US OUR TRANSGRESSIONS

Posted by Howard McQueen on October 5, 2009 at 8:08pm

© 2009 Howard McQueenIt all begins with an aggressiontowards oneself,often then jumps as projection upon someone else,escalating to a transgression,this inner aggression flung upon another.Perhaps the other has the sense of beingto see the projection, and diffuse the bomb of reaction,so that what is now loosedbecomes a wondrousboomerang of a double giftof FORGIVENESS.

FASCINATION WITH TEACHER

Posted by Howard McQueen on October 5, 2009 at 8:00pm

© 2009 Howard McQueenWe are magnetically/energetically drawn to thosethat hold the unfolding of our experience.They hold pointers,both negative and positive charges,to guide us deeper into suffering,as well as into our own central expression of Oneness.We sense in them a talent,they seemingly ply so well to their trade.Deep inside, this gift has yet to blossom in us,still timid, slightly shy, somewhat afraid.Clean teachers wake us more directly to our potential calling.Messy teachers do the same, adding on their own luggage,their own wild goose chase.If susceptible, we chase their geese for awhile,in order to learn the deeper lessons.There are no mistakesThere are no sins.There can be emergence and clear seeing from thesmoke and smog of our self delusions.Teach the truth of clear seeing.Walk the walk, talk the vocabularyof your very best,work-in-process Truths.

COMFORT IN THE SKIN

Posted by Howard McQueen on October 5, 2009 at 7:44pm

© 2009 Howard McQueenIt is so very easy to take noticethe shinning through radiance of another.Presence shines through their form.They exhibit a comfort in being in-their-skin,Fresh, alive, vulnerable, a kind of letting go in the world.A letting Grace manage whatever is to be encountered.Is it possible to be this trusting in your skin?You’ve been busy distrusting most of your life.How’s that been workin’ for ya?You and your willpower are akinTo spitting into a gale force wind.Try out just letting go.Let your essence shine through.No compromises anymore, be true to the essence of you,And you will then begin to fill ina fullness of your heart,a welling up of spiritand then you can just humbly radiate!

CANTEENS FOR THE SOUL

Posted by Howard McQueen on October 5, 2009 at 7:40pm

© 2009 Howard McQueenDoubt, suspicion and cynicismthe trio of advisorsoften tellstay clear of that well,it is likely tainted.And we walk right past the purist of springsoffering to slake our thirst anddeeply nourish our soul.

BEFORE ENTANGLEMENT

Posted by Howard McQueen on October 5, 2009 at 7:38pm

© 2009 Howard McQueenBefore we became entangledWe experienced direct engagementWith joy, discovery, play and our innocence.Then we were taught rulesWe learned, observing by exampleWe were bent by will, domesticatedTo perform, reform and conform to the worldTo survive, then succeed and thrive.In our innocence and naivety,We accepted this as the gospel.In revising our NowWe let all these obsessions and programming fall wayDisempowered, no longer resisted in any way.And we come full circle, progressively disentangled from past and conditioning.We are governed in the SilenceIt calls us to open more fullyTo live fiercely, completely vulnerableWith whatever we encounter.This is the real newsSimulcast now on every channel of Silence.~ ~ ~

DIS-ENTANGLED

Posted by Howard McQueen on October 5, 2009 at 7:30pm

© 2009 Howard McQueenBe fully present and awareTo what is arisingInternally,as you experience the outside world.Notice.Feel into it, without judgmentHang with it.Be not persuaded to do anythingother than to honestly see an obscured facet of yourself.Especially when it appears in someone else!

DISAPPOINTMENT

Posted by Howard McQueen on October 5, 2009 at 7:30pm

DISAPPOINTMENT© 2009 Howard McQueenI was to be the Host of the showand it started to blowas I was told folks could not show.Reschedule and holster your fragile ego,its way past time to do so.Be the Silence!Who are these children that speak and run wildIn their naïveté and exuberance?The answer they reveal:life is a patchwork of priorities to be navigatednot resisted: split up families, grandparents,double duty to honor all the rest.You are but a visiting Guest.Enjoy whatever opportunities happen in the moment –This more spontaneous alright-ness of all things,encourages a dynamic relaxing in aliveness of never knowing.Now, what was that about a fragile ego?Let it go,to drift below,to the furnace of Awakening Transformation.

BARNACLES OF LIFE

Posted by Howard McQueen on October 5, 2009 at 7:30pm

© 2009 Howard McQueenWe attach ourselves to people, objects in the world, beliefs, …Attachments, as we learn to feel into them, begin to revealAn ability for us to honestly appraise the energetic reactions and responses that encouraged our “attaching to” these relationships.Then, we can also feel into and surrender to our choice for continuing to sustain and the quality of these habitual patterns.Attributes like “how tightly we hold” an attachment or what is the nature of the psychic “cement” that forms the bond begin to illuminate and warm our awareness. We are well advised to bring loving-kindness to this work, else we can be harsh on ourselves and this can lead to denial and ascetic withdrawal.What a wonderful way to play and feel into what we are attached to and how we use our attachments to create a sense of security, or senses of [fill in the blank here]. What an amazing experience, this becoming self-aware through feeling into the quality of what and who we are attaching to ...

AUTHENTICITY ESCAPES AGAIN

Posted by Howard McQueen on October 5, 2009 at 7:00pm

© 2009 Howard McQueenA powerful energetically charged life situation arises.My habit – become small and contractedthen inflate the Angry double as stand-into act out in inverse behalf, anger and rage,smokescreen for tiny, powerless, victimized self,that escapes awayscampering into the labyrinthhiding places of the mind.

THE DETRITUS OF OUR IGNORANCE

Posted by Howard McQueen on October 5, 2009 at 7:00pm

© 2009 Howard McQueenAs we sweep aside the detritus of IgnoranceAnd allow the truth to flow,unimpeded and unrestricted through our energetic being,we liberate a unimagined potential to rebuild the new infrastructure,to incubate and grow by living together in Love, respect and freedom.The cloak, smoke, veil, wool pulled-over-our-eyes (whatever you call it) gig is up!Awareness has been tripped, the tipping point into we-ness, transpersonal awareness.This shift toward transformation is accelerating.Old infrastructures are being under-mined,sabotaged by the bonfires of the ego energy that has been long revered and worshiped.The fallout is instability in these structures that we are just learning to wean ourselves from.Our psychological attachments are being challenged,Long-standing, bought-into patterns and habits are proving to be non-sustainable.And a lot of fear is coming loose with the loosening of these attachments to the institutions we’ve entrusted our care to.There seems to be no other gentle way to invoke the un-doing that is needed.Hard landings, soft landings and everything in-between will be experienced.What was once subtle is increasing felt as a growing pressure to surrender fear and backfill this will something authentic. Love, liberty and the pursuit of work structures that support self-integrity, community goals and sustainability of the planet’s health and resources is emerging.This will greatly level the playing field,It will take time to unfold and it may neverbecome fully mainstream,however, know this:It will be practiced in a growing set of small communitiesand kept alive in spiritpreserved in our inheritance and our heritage.Sealed with blessings ...~~~...~~...~

WHY AREN’T YOU MORE #!@~! EMOTIONAL

Posted by Howard McQueen on October 5, 2009 at 9:00am

© 2009 Howard McQueenI was with a friend the other night and she was recounting a story of her best friend, who’s son was having repeated difficulties in his long-term romantic relationship. It seems his long standing live-in girl friend would occasionally leave him to try on greener pastures. Thus far, she has always come back.My friend became very enrapt in telling this tale. She was very emotionally involved and spoke on and on about the debilitating stress this placed on everyone in the family, especially the mom. Her friend, the mom, had just lost her husband.I felt the echoes of my friend, again deeply absorbed in her past loss of her husband, through infidelity and the associated emotional insanities, and the hardships that she encountered bringing up two kids and starting all over again. That time, for my friend, was frightening, caught in an emotional quicksand that is still alive deep inside her.Patterns of wounded-ness repeat themselves. We continue to walk past the locked-in-darkness rooms of the interior, where the torch of love has yet to shine brightly.I spoke words to this effect and her sense of emotional connection to the situation heightened, then she accused me of not being emotional and of being cerebral. She said that she felt that she had to become more emotional to make up for my emotional "distance". I've personally met her friend as well as the mom's son and the girlfriend, at the funeral of the father, where I grieved with everyone else.Mmmmmmm. Letting everything outside of me, be whatever it is and whatever it needs to beMy friend would wish everyone clear sailing and thus wants everyone in her life to go get counseling and shape up, so that her friend (and all of us) can be spared the additional burdens of dysfunctional family strife.As I speak my own peace, I remember to sip deeply from the well.When there is a wound in our emotional self,This is carried forward into the pretentiousness of adult life.We try and cover over our emotional, wounded immaturityby acting out our contrived, manufactured behaviors,The great big band-aid wrapped over our wounds.Her son, like all of uswill continue to queue this inner held griefuntil he goes inside and attends to the estrangement.And, this willingness to dive within may requirean increase in living in this pressure cookerheated by despair and depreciation.We humans have such a propensityfor wrestling with our delusion and suffering,before choosing to go inside.So, for me, I see a sort of divine benefit to repeated Suffering.It can bring us closer to the alterWhere we can willingly sacrifice our selfTo a greater will and force called Life,where we bring our brokenness and just let go of ego.And in this revealing, should we focus our intention,We can begin observing how choosing tore-parent ourselves from the inside out,brings a sacred healing.So, without any doubt,And with an ironic sense of satisfaction,If it is repeated sufferingthat is the sandpaper needed to wear us thin,know that this is what brought me toTHE ALTER OF LOVE!

DESERT BEDOUIN ROSE

Posted by Howard McQueen on October 3, 2009 at 10:00am

(C) 2009 Howard McQueenAaaaaaOOOOooooMmmmm ...Oh sacred Bedouin [1] spirit,wrapped in colorful shawl,you gaze out from your desert of desolation,stripped down to your beauty, essential and raw.Your intoxicating, percolating spiritpooling in the darkness of your eyes,immersed so deeply,steeped in dark, brooding Mystery.The rose, tucked away in a book of fine desert prose,one thousand years ago.Re-opened and read just now,provokes that exotic perfumed sensory whiffonce adorned and worn by you.Deep in your rapture,I am beholding again,the image of such uncomposed,underlying, vulnerableancient Beauty.~...~I am so grateful for you,sister held in soul,who chose to cut your hair and dieout on these high desert plainsjust one year ago.You constantly take my breath away,reminding me to persistently sipfrom the deeper wellof eternal nourishment.[1] Bedouin: a member of a nomadic tribe, a wanderer, moving about according to the seasons (in this case, the interior seasons supported by the soul).~ ~ ~

ONENESS ALWAYS ALLOWING

Posted by Howard McQueen on October 1, 2009 at 5:00pm

RAPTURE OF VOLCANO

Posted by Howard McQueen on October 1, 2009 at 5:00pm

(C) 2009 Howard McQueenSuch rapture and beautyheld at bay.The heart of your volcano,smouldering,wanting to erupt with such forceit takes the breath away.Thus in my own wayI root for thee to be releasedfrom your bondageand secret vows with Grief.~ ... ~ ... ///>! - HM

BAKED IN FULL SPECTRUM RADIANCE

Posted by Howard McQueen on October 1, 2009 at 5:00pm

(C) 2009 Howard McQueenIt makes a difference sometimes,being four thousand feetcloser to thehydrogen-fusion reactorwe call Our Sun, old sol,warming us,ninety-three million miles away.Blue Skies and the Red Rocks of Sedona,these ancient carved landscapesare encouraging and provoking meto step off the trailsto wake up well ahead of the dawnto really drink in and appreciate the freedoms ...Plenty to be grateful forlike our long lifespan,lived in the wink of Sol - ha![sighing]A knowing deep withinthat there are forms and an orderapproaching an infinite underlying magnitude.Resting in the relative timeless backdropof fifty trillion starsbrings its own sense of serenityinsignificance - interconnectedness,shrouded in deep, deep Mystery.~ ~ ~This entry is provoking a sense of sacred reverie, this blissful, temporary release of earthly cares and just basking in the Oneness, like a lizard baking in the mid-afternoon sun. We are indeed well-captured when portrayed as God's creatures of sensual delight. - HM

TECTONIC QUAKES FROM THE PAST

Posted by Howard McQueen on October 1, 2009 at 1:30pm

(C) 2009 Howard McQueenThis past week, I was witness toa rugged, self-reliant, beautiful woman,successful artist, loving wife (etc. rich life resume ...)Completely break downinto great bouts of sobbing,deep weeping from an inner despair.A current friend of hers was not finding any footingand constantly sliding away from love,when this lady's love was close enough to be felt seemingly everywhere.This beautiful woman was invited to attend to her childhood,the stored in the mind-body memories of living in a wasteland,where love would not respond and could not be grown.She was reminded that no matter how diligent in efforting she tried,Visiting her deep and amply filled well,to take up the bucket brigade time-and-againto encourage love in family,it was not even remotely enoughto tip the scales in favor of Love.As these emotional depth charges began to subside,her body went into a lengthy series of inner tectonic quakes.She acknowledged the link between these special effectsand the long-standing chronic fatigue,expressing through her in after lunch naps,the necessary recharging of these fifty year old essence gaps.~ ~ ~This weeping was so profound that it carried the invitation of inclusivity for all humans on this earthDedicated to A. - Blessings to all - HM

A PARTING WITH REMORSE

Posted by Howard McQueen on October 1, 2009 at 12:00pm

(C) 2009 Howard McQueenA friend called me last night,drowning in her mix of sadness and remorse.An eighty three year old dear friendof her now departed mom had died this afternoonin her bed in the assisted living home.My friend had been a devoted visitor and friend to this lady just passed.My friend chose the path of biting her tonguein the face of the chafing cynicism and witthis now passed woman had nursed along.The evening before, she had visited her friend,and felt compelled to speak her peace on a topic.Late, in the pre-dawn of day of passing,her friend's email contained a wobble-of-imbalance,a resistance to accepting another's truth.Then, all signals were lost.Her daughter found her passed that afternoon.My friend would wish everyone blessed to find freedom from the sadness and grief that comes with living in this earth school.... ... ...As I sit with this, and having known the now deceased, I feel that we can all served by knowing when to speak truth when it it contained and carried in love. It can fill the sails of those departing for re-birth, allowing each and every one of us the opportunity to step out of our deeply worn grooves and ruts.This then, is my work-in-process blessing:We live in this earthly realm, this interface of light and darkness. It is in friendship and camaraderie and willingness to explore and uncover the sometimes raw truth that life shares with us, that we may perhaps find liberation, and if not that, at least a resting in solace - with the trouble and turbulence we identify within our experiences. - HM

GETTING TO KNOW THE EXQUISITE

Posted by Howard McQueen on October 1, 2009 at 11:30am

(c) 2009 Howard McQueenGet it touch with the feelingthis inner knowingat the center of your heartthat,Being is something exquisite.Re-partner and repatriateso you may take up residence and fully manifest this life.Everything else is just playing with shadowslistening to echoes, old habits,nothing to do with naming and experiencing energetic Love.~ ~ ~

THE NURTURER'S DESPAIR

Posted by Howard McQueen on October 1, 2009 at 11:30am

(C) 2009 Howard McQueenThe abyss of despairYou're already F'Ked.Hope completely lostthen found in holding thevulnerable other and consoling them.Consoling, nurturing energiespracticed in-the-moment, on-demand,always for someone else's welfare.Make room for loveas it has come back hometo finally roost within you.

CONTAINER, NOT CONTAINMENT

Posted by Howard McQueen on October 1, 2009 at 11:05am

(C) 2009 Howard McQueenWe delight in playing in the light.Come join me, finding some playfulnessin the mud and murkiness of the primitive swampThe strength of our Container of fellowship and familywhen built from the full spectrum of energiesbrings a fullness of empowermentan extra sturdiness of backboneto stand still and face the unknowing.

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