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GUANO, MOLASSES & QUESTING

© 2009 Howard McQueenI woke up at 5:30 this morning, got out of bed, turned on the light and "ducked" to the floor as if someone was already in motion swinging a baseball bat at my noggin. Up on the ceiling, circling my rotating ceiling fan was a furry, winged, squeaking sonar navigating bat. Hmmmm. Such an omen to begin the day -- such guano on yesterday's freshly vacuumed carpets.I warmed up my early morning chai, went upstairs and happened to glance at an open magazine on a coffee table. The article title caught my attention "... transcendent dreaming ...", published in a Shamanistic magazine [1].Down into the second page something jumped off the page, and this I recognized as medicine I could share with a friend. It read"I felt this heavy syrupy feeling" needing to fall into sleep ...My friend has been reporting having this constant feeling of being stuck, like in molasses.The body communicates pain when it is impaired, damaged, etc.What and how would the Self (deepest sense of underlying self) communicate if it were impaired?I am sensing, from my own experiences, the Self would communicate physiologically, mentally, and emotionally, and would send signals in our awake state and our dreaming state that would reach us and be felt asconstriction, unease, dread, and a kind of resistance/friction in the deeper subsconscious not being in clear communion with the more conscious aspects of self (and the occasional completely magical artifacts arising in dreams and waking synchronicity ...)This malaise/stress/friction could be given summary labels such as conflict, not living up to our potential, stuck-ness, rotting on the vine, depression, constant anxiety (to give it but a few labels).The author of the transcendent dreaming article believes that dreams contribute blueprints (I would also suggest dreams are valuable as road maps - signposts) to an awakening for a transcendent humanity. She also went on to talk about a series of mystical episodes she had with dreams and how many things in awake life synchnonized with her dream elements. I can report that this is happening to me to, although my material is not anywhere near as "episodic" as what she reports (although being greeted by the bat clearly qualifies as something more likely experienced after a night of drinking too much laudanum" :-) ).Cut to the QuestingI believe my friend’s work and all our inner work centers around aligning with a deepest sense of Self, uncovering the fire that is smouldering, and doing a [somewhat] controlled burn of the subconscious materials and patterns that serve the ego, but don't serve our more divine Self. Divine awareness cares not what your age is, or your mental prowess, or how much money you have in the bank -- divine awareness invites you to step up, open up, and allow it to emerge, so that what becomes the norm, the habit, invoke the obsession to constantly embrace emergence of awareness and love.Love you, my friend. Hugs and kisses.Be gentle with yourself. Start with small steps and use discipline to keep challenging yourself. Life is like Edison: Each experiment brings you closer to realization, thus no experiment is a failure!!!***I must confess that the title (and who knows what else) for this post has been influenced by reading the first sixteen pages of Wild Ducks Flying Backward,The Short Writings of Tom Robbins (Bantam Books, 2005). With this as bedside reading, there is no telling what other visitors will be making their appearance known as the fairy dust is applied and the magic carpet rides again ...***[1] Shaman’s Drum No. 77 2008; Awakening into Transcendent Dreaming, by Chistina Donnell, Ph.D.
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SINGULARITY ARISINGS

(C) 2009 Howard McQueenI’ve been recently drawn to this word, singularity. My original context was around feeling into the increased momentum of change and the pressures being focused on us humans and our human-constructed systems (economic, psychological, etc.). Here are some definitions retrieved from the web.Definition: singularity• the quality of being one of a kind; "that singularity distinguished him from all his companions"• strangeness by virtue of being remarkable or unusual• In mathematics, a singularity is in general a point at which a given mathematical object is not defined, or a point of an exceptional set where it fails to be well-behaved in some particular way; In general, a singularity is a point at which an equation, surface, etc., blows up or becomes degenerate ...• In astronomy, a term often used to refer to the center of a black hole, where the curvature of spacetime is maximal. At the singularity, the gravitational tides diverge; no solid object can even theoretically survive hitting the singularity.• Transhumanist: The Singularity is a common matter of discussion in trans-humanist circles. There is no clear definition, but usually the Singularity is meant as a future time when societal, scientific and economic change is so fast we cannot even imagine what will happen from our present perspective, and when humanity will become posthumanity. Another definition is used in the Extropians FAQ, where it denotes the singular time when technological development will be at its fastest.I remember watching 2001 A Space Odyssey (1968), the very futuristic movie by Stanley Kubrick, spawned from short stories by Arthur C. Clark. Looking back, this movie instilled a sense of wonder, and perhaps this is resurfacing now in my life.This summer I read the provocative book “The Age of the Unthinkable”. It speaks about “tippng points”, fundamental shifts that occur in highly complex systems. These shifts cannot be easily predicted and as such, contain enormous surprise (shock) value when a tipping point is triggered. .Personally, I am most interested in the shift in human consciousness as it relates to singularity. This emergence of self-awareness to me qualifies as a form of singularity arising. When an individual reaches a tipping point and chooses / (is driven) to become authentic, their inner world and their energetic field undergoes a radical, transformational shift. Their relationship to the external world is forever altered. Setting aside the “special effects” that can come out of this transformation, the sense of connectedness to something much vaster can be one of the outcomes. From my perspective, the insights that come through to the individual from this relationship with Vastness point to a bottomless depth of Mystery.This is such a wonderful time to be alive, to work through our fears and to participate in awakening. Together we can live life and chronicle the events and the huge tidal shifts taking place on our planet and within/across the full spectrum of our human consciousness and awareness.If you also happen to be provoked (positively or negatively) by this post, I invite you to connect and share your comments by emailing me: howard@mcq.com.
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FEELING INTO THE “WINCE” OF LIFE

(C) 2009 Howard McQueenEvery time we encounter our shadow, we are standing on the brink of a threshold.We feel discomfort, we become short of breath, we shrink, we become numb, filled with anxiety. We feel very compelled to manufacture something to distract us from our discomfort.A female friend and I were out having lunch recently, enjoying ourselves immensely, celebrating the continued unfolding of our natural, loving friendship.We were sitting outside and she asked the waiter where the restrooms were. He escorted her inside to the restrooms. She came back out with a slip of paper that he had handed her that contained his name and phone number.My friend has a very solid spiritual relationship with her husband. She also professes to be quite naïve when it comes to men choosing to put her in the spotlight of attention. She has this slip of paper, kind of hiding it under the table as she tells me about the encounter. She is going into her slightly confused and small little girl persona (like someone in fifth grade who was passed a secret note and the teacher is on to the note). There is conflict arising in her.I suggest that we do a bit of role playing. She agrees so I immediately accept the role of her and she accepts the role of the waiter. I take the note with the name and phone number into my hands.I (as her) say to her (as the waiter) “I’m a bit naïve when men show interest in me and am wondering if you could tell me a bit more about your intentions for handing me the note with your phone number?”She (as the waiter) says “Because I find you attractive and would like to get to know you better”.I (as her) say to her (as the waiter) “I’m very happily married; however I am open to authentic friendships”. Is this something you might be interested in?”Our role playing stops -- as she pulls the slip of paper from my hand and resolutely heads towards the restaurant entrance muttering “I am out of my comfort zone doing this”.She returns from her encounter and tells me that she entered into conversation with our waiter and told him that she was naïve and was curious as to his intentions for handing her the note. He said that he found her attractive and wanted to know if he could call her sometime. She informed him that she was happily married, but would be open to a friendship. She mentioned that as she delivered her “happily married status” information, he sort of “winced”.I asked her if she could feel into reading more of the energetic signature surrounding his wince. She paused and felt it contained surprise/shock/disappointment. She then remembers saying to him “I find you very sweet”, passing to him a pure and genuine emotion, reaching back into a space of kindness.However, even after this conversation between the two of them has played out, and she is back at the table reciting this story to me, she still has the note firmly gripped in her hand and still feels compelled to want to do something more, i.e. to extend herself in some way.I say to her that from my perspective, what she has described of the conversation with the waiter, has come to a very natural conclusion -- and that it was clean and there were no loose ends. I was of the opinion that the waiter was given clear signals that she was indeed not available and that he would moderate his expectations accordingly.She was thinking that she still owed him a phone call, or something …What is in play here is our tendency, when our system is under pressure, to manufacture something to add on to the experience. We delude ourselves into thinking the experience was lacking or incomplete, when in reality we kind of checked out and were not present for the full experience. It is the inner awkwardness asserting itself. In the original energetic response (when my friend felt small and constricted) the shadow gravity force was shrinking her and occupying that vacated space.She has a big heart and lots of compassion, and would like to spare others the painful feelings of rejection. She knows that this projected rejection lives and arises first within her energy field.What I find marvelous about her is her ability to step up in the moment and do the work, i.e. stop talking and analyzing and go explore and face her awkwardness and discomfort --- allow the vulnerability to be experienced and more fully felt.We feel very fragile during these exchanges. Someone (perhaps both individuals) may inevitably “wince” as pull-backs are triggered from the discomfort. The important thing is to be as aware and present to the moment when these energetic reactions arise. Either right then and/or shortly thereafter, feel into the emotional charges and experiences that create the pressure to alter (shrink) yourself. Remember that when you shrink yourself, the default response is to manufacture something to stand in for your misplaced fullness.In truth, we are seldom as vulnerable as it may appear (or we feel). When we use the tools of honesty, natural inquiry and open conversation, bridges form, allowing two individuals the space to begin communicating in an increasingly intimate exchange.It sometimes helps to have a coach, silently rooting from your corner. You’ve got to go into the ring alone, but a coach / advocate (even if virtual) is a blessing, so long as they insist that you do the work and that they remain humble facilitators. I get a lot of satisfaction sharing friendship with her, as she has an extremely well-developed spirit-warrior heroine persona, always ready and willing to walk through whatever fear arises!What a wonderful way to get on with the work of healing yourself. You may find that you also indirectly aid the other person you are sharing awkwardness with, as your frankness, candor and warming to the truth can often cause them to step up to being authentic in the moment.
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SWEET FULLNESS IN RELATIONSHIPS

© 2009 Howard McQueenThis wearing away of self.This inviting in the ferocious,house-cleaning, transformational Love --Makes room and space in this moment for heaven on earth.And I stand alone,feeling into being rootedin this sacred relationship.Knowing the process will bring aboutmany more beginnings and endings.I am sensing the fullness of possibilitiesfor cultivating the most fragrant, sensuous relationships,overflowing with gratitude, service and love.
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LOVE IS ...

© 2009 Howard McQueenLOVE IS:RadicalIrrepressableCombustibleIncandescentPurifyingUnconditionalUniversalLiberatingTransformationalUnifyingUtterly transpersonalandbest lived ~ constantly shared ~ spoken from the heart;-)
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TRUE JIHAD

This appeared in EnlightenNext Magazine, excerpted here. I highly recommend that you read and digest the full article. Please visit the full text article True JihadTRUE JIHADby Elizabeth DeboldIn a recent post on the EnlightenNext Editors' Blog, we featured a previously unpublished article written by senior editor Elizabeth Debold entitled, “True Jihad.” In it she speaks about the broader spiritual significance of this Islamic term, which has in recent years become unfortunately associated almost exclusively with religiously inspired acts of terrorism:The truer, greater meaning of jihad refers to the battle for the utter liberation of the spirit from the tyrannical nafs—the unconscious motivation in the human psyche that insists on separation and division. . . . The point that the religious traditions make—and illustrate through the wild images of Tibetan demons, Satanic spirits, and the personification of the Seven Deadly Sins—is that there is something fundamental within each of us that must be named, faced, and conquered in order to free the human spirit. The sins of our forefathers weren't simply an inventory of human darkness; they pointed to what needed to be transcended, moved beyond, in order to realize the glory of God ringing through the beauty and goodness of creation....Please visit the full text article True Jihad
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DAWN AT TYBEE

© 2009 Howard McQueenDawn has arrived as I find my way out to the end of the Tybee Beach pier.Sol is just breaking through clouds settled above the oceanic horizon.There is a near constant fifteen knot breeze, keeping the summer morning abnormally comfortable.Pelicans glide by hugging the agitated surface - not quite white capped.Surfers gently bob up and down, sensing and awaiting their perfect wave.Majestic clouds tower into the polarized blue sky, revealing luminous silver-white linings.Fishermen bait hooks.A flock of pigeon arc by overhead.The roar of surf echoes from the nearby shore.Turning my back to the ocean, the beach town is littered with motels. I passed multi-level condos on my way to the pier, occupied by vacationers on balconies staring into laptops, some already loudly hurling words into their cell phones. From the pier, a two story pink-sided building announces in one story white painted lettering “Time to Eat”.Ahhh. A group of surfers catch and ride their chosen wave.Another formation of pelican effortlessly idle by, their wing tips scant inches from the wave tops.Sol again peeks out from the clouds and the day noticeably warms.I turn my back to the town and a magnificent canal glistens with infinite jewels of faceted brilliant light, starting from the edge of the boardwalk and extending to the horizon, merging into Sol. I surrender and merge with this light ... and am called back.A dark skinned man with a close-cropped shining silver goatee has stopped to greet me. He inquires as to what I am writing, and I read him the first several lines of this (at the time, hand-scrawled) journal entry. He is from India and is Hindu. He says he is 70 years old -- my biological guess -- a trim 62. He speaks proudly of his two sons, both physicians, one practicing at Duke. We speak about Holi, the early spring festival in India where the air and everything is drenched with colored dyes. He smiles deeply in fellowship and takes back up his power walking.Sol peeks out again over my left shoulder.A kite is now flying high above a vacant lifeguard stationThe rhythm of surfing honors the ocean,as do the patient and silent pelican and human fishermen.I stand at or just above the Category Five storm surge mark, having passed this color coded, totem-pole type milestone marker at the pier's entrance. I am reminded that all the human-made forms I have just experienced are not-so-permanent, easily washed away, eroded and reclaimed.I adore this planetThis existenceAll this connectedness****To my friend Jim, who works/or did work (so many layoffs these days) at Stingray and Dr. Steve and Eva and all of my blood family and friends in Savannah and elsewhere.
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WHAT MATTERS MOST

© 2009 Howard McQueenWhat matters most is that unconditional loveis incubated and constantly cultivatedin the sacred internal silent space.And those things covering over Lovefully embraced and blessed,space made for surrender and forgiveness,summoning acceptance and Grace.and in death the dance is seen anewand I am transformedmy relationship to the external world re-imaginedin Love
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AGGRESSION

© 2009 Howard McQueenLet the words you speak to others reflect a We-ness,an inclusive invitation of fellowship.If you are unable to hold this intent,Remain humble and hold off ventingYour personal wounded I-ness.Take up pen and inscribe your poison,The anger and injustice welling up inside you.It will be triggered repeatedly.Each occurrence will give you more of an energetic profileA specific signature you can piece togetherFor me, freshly triggered experiences with new people in my lifeelicited an aggression response way off-the-scalewhen compared to the actual current encounter.This allowed me to walk back into my past, holding hands with curiosity and courage,and ultimately identify the source, i.e. where the distortion and trauma first began.Then, we begin to practice forgiveness and surrenderIn order to transform our obsession and fixed patterns of reaction-response, allowing room for aa far greater, sweeter, innocent love. This holding in rather than venting is an important discipline for those caught up in the patterns of aggression (speak (strike) first and ask questions later, if at all). It allows the aggressive energy to be transformed into energetic responses to life that carry the emergent qualities of blessings, sweetness and unity.See also the TRUE JIHAD posting for calling us to step up to do this infrastructure work.And may the We-ness we cultivate coalesce and progressively collapse into One-ness.
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MANUFACTURING LOSTNESS

© 2009 Howard McQueenWe have become so convinced thatsomething real has been lostthat we manufacture experience and personasto live in our lostness.Doubt, cynicism and with the world crying outand rewarding oh-so-much-more inauthenticity,We cover our our heart andobscure our primal identity.This is a powerful, constant obsession,this cultural chorus of brutality,veiled with confusion.Feeling into this, becoming intimate with this mental disease,seeing it, identifying it, naming it -the hardened shell softens and cracks -debris comes to the surface.No need to shield yourself now.Freedom to cleanup beginsNew radical potential emergesand identity is Rediscovered....
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SUFFERING

© 2009 Howard McQueenSuffering (psychological) is not an illusion,but an emotionally-charged inner fiction.Many of these fictional dramas are played outwith the external world.****Suffering (psychological) is essentiallypersonal resistanceto accepting lifeon its terms.****SufferingSuffering is not an illusion, it is very painful, full of stress and pressure. Suffering is your entire being trying to communicate with you that an infrastructure shift is needed in perspective and attitudes.Much suffering is self-imposed by our freedom to chooseMuch is inherited from the culture we are domesticated intoAll suffering can be shaped and re-forgedWhen heart is openedWhen self is embodiedLife will find its way thru you!Stop trying.Let yourself become undone.Love life and all aspects of life, unconditionally and Life will take up residence and you will merge with the flow of life.In 2001 I asked for guidance to fully explore (and be engulfed in) suffering.In 2007 I asked for guidance to see the purpose of suffering.Today (August 10, 2009), on the way via water to Annapolis the above verses arrived.How important it is to allow enough time for our lessons to unfold and be fully received.
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THE PERFECT HI-JACKING OR ...

© 2009 Howard McQueenOur awareness, our sensitivity, stolen,given away, covered overPerfectly hi-jacked -- again.And the soul waits patientlyAs the suffering mountsAs the pressure cooker is turned up."Please me again" says the ego."Provoke me further" says the Anam.Bring your loving attentionto dig deeper into healing- my confusion- my division- my conflictI offer you the power of innocenceto cut through the veils to your truth.- Will you continue to hide your innocence?- Will you choose to keep hanging out in your distortions?Will you speak deeply the vows of unconditional Love?Will you take up and defend unconditional Love:As your only shield,As your badge of honor,In eternal communal collaboration,threading and weaving the tapestry of this life?Allow yourself to rest in this spacious, healing Innocence .Celebrate, Liberate, Share and Defend the innocence in Love
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COMPELLED TO INSCRIBE YOUR STORY

Text transcribed from Chris Cade's (C) Inscribe Your Life / Inspiring Quotes VideoI have become involved as a non-compensated volunteer contributor with Chris Cade and his Inscribe Your Life web presence. The first free community-building (and story-telling) ULR devoted "conflict", can be accessed belowInscribe Your Life / Conflict .Chris also offers a fee-based subscription to video content and community support. This is currently focused on calling out your Storyteller, to tell your story in words, then step up to awaken in your words and revise your story. In my humble opinion, this is modestly priced and good quality practice, as well as support by Chris and the forming community.Below are quotes to support the healing power of telling stories and becoming involved in the re-authoring and re-writing of our own life stories. May you find your own voice to inscribe your own story."Thou shalt not" is soon forgotten, but "once upon a time" lasts forever - Phillip PullmanThe shortest distance between truth and a human being is a story - Anthony De MelloThere have been great societies that did not use the wheel, but there have been no societies that did not tell stories - Ursula K. LeGuinTo be a person is to have a story to tell - Isak DinesenNurture your mind with great thoughts, to believe in the heroic makes heroes - Benjamin DisraeliFairy tales are more than true, not because they tell us that dragons exist, but because they tell us dragons can be beaten - G. K. ChestersonSometimes the story finds the storyteller, not the other way around - T.L. Pierson, NeverwasThe destiny of the world is determined less by the battles that are lost and won than the stories it loves and believes in - Harold GoddardA hero is an ordinary person who finds the strength to persevere and endure in spite of overwhelming obstacles - Christopher ReeveWhat I've started I must finish. I've gone too far to turn back. Regardless of what my happen, I have to go forward - Bastian, The Neverending StoryA hero is no braver than an ordinary man, but he is brave five minutes longer - Ralph Waldo EmersonOpportunities to find deeper powers within ourselves come when life seems most challenging - Joseph CampbellWhat is to give light must endure burning - Victor FranklAnything unattempted remains impossible - UnknownChallenges are what make life interesting: overcoming them is what makes life meaningful - Joshua J. MarineDifficulties are meant to rouse, not discourage. The human spirit is to grow strong by conflict - William Ellery ChanningOne who gains strength by overcoming obstacles possesses the only strength that can overcome adversity - Albert SchweitzerI truly believe we can overcome any hurdle that lies before us and create the life we want to live - Gillian AndersonEveryone is necessarily the hero of his own life - John BarthIf stories come to you, care for them. And learn to give them away where they are needed. Sometimes a person needs a story more than food to stay alive. Barry LopezOur stories are not about what happened nearly as much as how we feel about what happened - Victoria MoranAfter nourishment, shelter and companionship, stories are the thing we need most in the world - Philip PullmanIt's the process of writing and life that matters ... we are trying to become sane along with our poems and stories - Natalie GoldbergThere is no agony like bearing an untold story inside you - Maya AngelouWriting a story or a novel is one way of discovering sequence in experience, of stumbling upon cause and effect in the happenings of writers own life. - Eudora WeltyBecause there is a natural storytelling urge and ability in all human beings, even just a little nurturing of this impulse can bring about astonishing and delightful results - Nancy MellonStories can conquer fear you know. They can make the heart larger - Ben OkriLive your life from your heart. Share your heart. And your stories will touch and heal peoples' souls - Melody BeattieDo not be satisfied with the stories that come before you. Unfold your own myth. - Janal-al-Din RumiBless this gift of the story-teller awakening within us. Allow this to unfurl in us, as well as in our communities and to breath life into these stories of service and love and the deep pain and pleasure of reclaiming what it means to be vulnerable, innocent and alive - Howard McQueen
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RADIATE O' SPIRIT OF FRANK ZAPPA !

© 2009 Howard McQueenLyrics by Frank ZappaThe other morning I was in Kannapolis at a trailer sales and supply store to have a towing wiring harness connected to my 1995 F-150. A buzz-shaved man in his late 30s was behind the counter, wearing a T-shirt print of skull and crossbones and other symbolisms. As I arrived at the counter, he spent every bit of five minutes telling me about what was going on in his shop and what was going on in his mind.When his conversation naturally ebbed, I politely introduced myself as the 10 am appointment for the wiring harness. He grabbed the part from behind the counter and I backed the truck in the bay and he got started.It is almost always rewarding when we wait patiently for intuition and insight to guide a relationship into avenues of exploration and discovery (the silver lining where gifts are stored). While he was working under the tailgate of themy truck, I asked him if he happened to be a fan of Frank Zappa and the Mothers of Invention (I suspect I had not thought about Frank Zappa for a number of years, but hey, we learn to trust intuition). There was a brief pause before he responded, then he got up off the ground and invited me to follow him back behind the counter where I first met him. He had pulled from his home studio yesterday an old video of a Frank Zappa concert (1979?) and burned this on a DVD, which was now in the DVD drive of the office computer. As we started to watch the intro to this concert, the hair was rising on the back of my neck and it was then that he simultaneously turned to me and said “I’m getting a huge crop of goose bumps", and he held out his arm and indeed the goose flesh was quite impressive.In the first video segment Frank is at the front conducting the small band and all sorts of unusual music is pouring out of the musicians and their instruments. This music was not for everyone, and Frank Zappa was not concerned that many people did not particularly care for his music. He also did not give his attention to the many people that spread rumors that he was a radical or labeled a drug user, weirdo, etc. Frank hung out with some very unusual looking friends/musicians and gifted the world some really unique music.To the best of my knowledge, in his adult life, Frank Zappa was drug-free. I believe he embodied this irrepressible artistry and expression for life, found in exploring off the beaten paths, liberating music that built up as pressure within him.I attended a Mothers of Invention concert ~ 1975 during a time when I was serving as an usher at the Fox Theater (Atlanta, Ga.). Prior to hearing this concert, I was not a Frank Zappa fan and did not really follow his music. I remember one particular song/lyric “Movin’ to Montana Soon” that really struck me as vivid and entirely original.This song just "happened" to be next up on the DVD my host and I were enjoying behind the counter, so I was literally transported back to 1975 and I told him so. He then told me when he was ten years old, he relentlessly badgered his mom to buy him a ticket to a Frank Zappa concert near his rural home town. His mom did finally relent and this young boy of ten was turned on to the musical feast of a genius – Frank Zappa, playing his holy, unabashed music. Today, my friend is a guitarist by night and has an in-home studio where he records with friends.As I left the shop, this fella and I had become intimately connected through the passion of creative music from a genius that lived and died young, quite a long time ago. This blog posting is to commemorate the irrepressible bright light that Frank Zappa brought into many lives through his music and dedication to living a life of fierce independence and raw celebration, irrespective of what anyone else thought of him or his music.Below are the lyrics to the song - that raised the hair on my neck and created my friend’s gooseflesh – again!And this below link goes out everyone on the blog, with a timely emphasis to Kimberly in celebration of her birthdayhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eJN_uWaVRfoHAPPY BIRTHDAY KIMBERLYHAPPY BIRTHDAY [spirit of FRANK ZAPPA]MAY WE ALL BE SO SUBLIMELY INFECTED AND IN LOVE WITH LIFE:-)MontanaBy Frank ZappaI might be movin' to Montana soonJust to raise me up a crop ofDental FlossRaisin' it upWaxen it downIn a little white boxI can sell uptownBy myself I wouldn'tHave no boss,But I'd be raisin' my lonelyDental FlossRaisin' my lonelyDental FlossWell I just might grow me some beesBut I'd leave the sweet stuffFor somebody else...but then, on the other hand I'dKeep the waxN' melt it downPluck some FlossN' swish it aroun'I'd have me a cropAn' it'd be on top (that's why I'M movin' to Montana)Movin' to Montana soonGonna be a Dental Floss tycoon (yes I am)Movin' to Montana soonGonna be a mennil-toss flykuneI'm pluckin' the ol'Dennil FlossThat's growin' on the prairiePluckin' the floss!I plucked all day an' all nite an' allAfternoon...I'm ridin' a small tiny hoss(His name is MIGHTY LITTLE)He's a good hossEven thoughHe's a bit dinky to strap a big saddle orBlanket on anywayHe's a bit dinky to strap a big saddle orBlanket on anywayAny wayI'm pluckin' the ol'Dennil FlossEven if you think it is a little silly, folksI don't care if you think it's silly, folksI don't care if you think it's silly, folksI'm gonna find me a horseJust about this bigAn' ride him all along the border lineWith aPair of heavy-dutyZircon-encrusted tweezers in my handEvery other wrangler would sayI was mighty grandBy myself I wouldn'tHave no bossBut I'd be raisin' my lonelyDental FlossRaisin' my lonelyDental FlossRaisin' my lonelyDental FlossWell I mightRide along the borderWith my tweezers gleamin'In the moon-lighty nightAnd then I'dGet a cuppa cawfeeN' give my foot a push...Just me 'n the pymgy ponyOver the Dennil Floss BushN' then I might justJumb back onAn' rideLike a cowboyInto the dawn to MontanaMovin' to Montana soon(Yippy-Ty-O-Ty-Ay)Movin' to Montana soon***
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For A New Beginning

For A New BeginningBenedictus, A Book of Blessings (Bantam Press)By John O'DonohueIn out-of-the-way places of the heart,Where your thoughts never think to wander,This beginning has been quietly forming,Waiting until you were ready to emerge.For a long time it has watched your desire,Feeling the emptiness growing inside you,Noticing how you willed yourself on,Still unable to leave what you had outgrown.It watched you play with the seduction of safetyAnd the grey promises that sameness whispered,Heard the waves of turmoil rise and relent,Wondered would you always live like this.Then the delight, when your courage kindled,And out you stepped onto new ground,Your eyes young again with energy and dream,A path of plenitude opening before you.Though your destination is not yet clearYou can trust the promise of this opening;Unfurl yourself into the grace of beginningThis is at one with your life's desire.Awaken your spirit to adventure;Hold nothing back, learn to find ease in risk;Soon you will be home in a new rhythmFor your soul senses the world that awaits you.
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A Nod of Appreciation to our Maestro

© 2009 Howard McQueenWe are blessed when we meet someone who gives us clean, unambiguous pointers to living life fullyThis ability to point someone to their essence becomes a talent that may arise in us.I gave my teacher the nickname “Maestro”.He has quickened within me, the orchestrator, the symphony conductor of life energy.The Maestro is so full of love, our circle of presence calls forth this viral, radical Love.I sense my inner Maestro arising, clearing out old circuits that bled off energy,Organic diagnostics awaken to test and scrutinize the infrastructure programs.My infrastructure programming is undergoing major rewrites,a dynamic revision process set into motionto re-imagine the radically altered human operating system.There are reasons we humans have uncovered the gifts of quantum physics,of the double helix structure of our DNA,of the silicon-based digital operating systems that are already virally connecting us.These reasons will become clearer to us as we inwardly use these gifts to encourage our consciousness to behold the interconnectedness and interdependencies of energy and matter.We begin to consciously experiment individually and in groups to shape responses to life through intent and our gift of languaging our intents so we can move into intimacy.
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© 2009 Howard McQueenA whisper of an invitation can be heard “come fall into a love”so deepso sweetso innocentyou will live again as the innocence of your child,filled with wonder at belonging to this worldconnected to everything that your heart can imagine.What you will experience will astound you.You will discover a root of the human condition,a perceived belief that love is absent.You will see human beings believing and practicing scarcity of Love,against the backdrop of the ever present, infinite energy of Love held and sustained in Creation.You will find unparalleled Joy in your alonenessMatched only by the Joy in fellowship with others,Especially those opening to being in LoveThe gardens need tending toThe gardeners need guidance and pointersThe soil of the soul calls out for compostingThis is the humble work, when done in the fellowship of a love-based community,Bears the fruits of Heaven, on this earth.You will find me wandering the gardensI am many faces,you will remember and recognize me.Together, we will all fall in Love.---------------------------------------------------We weep these tears of joy to celebrate our liberating love. These tears we catch to water the gardens. They contain an essential purity and necessary quality for cultivating Love.***
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© 2009 Howard McQueenGood morning [nameless essence],I love you, as you are, the whole work-in-process package.It is really something to behold one self (or any self, or all our selves). Everything we think we know, and that we intuit and even everything we glean from direct experience, are but tiny rocks and chunks of gold, that hint at the expression of the precious facets, the embodiment of life into the human form.It is what we make of humans practicing spirit and spirit practicing at being in human form.Life is such a mystery and death awaits us, constantly, often not so secretly trying to seduce us.And then, there is love, ever-present, very shy, not-a-seductress and only a weak gravity pull in the mind.Fortunately, we have the Heart, else we could never forgive or heal ourselves of the real traumas of fear and injustice that sweep through humanity's mind.And, we have the ability to rest in the blessings of Heart, with all of our being, and to let go, let life be.I am finding that it is even much simpler than all this, but I've not yet found the words. Perhaps there are only pointers, signs, hidden everywhere, in everything, just waiting for us to notice ;-) .Perhaps even this humble message from a fool of life carries a signal that others will find sustenance from in this radically changing world that we and our lineage of ancestors have manifested.The signal of Love is becoming strong in my life. Most everything else I've believed in has been mostly distraction, or defense, or ...Pass along my best, until our next kiss.****A tribute to my current teacher - MR, for illuminating THE FRIENDEnhanced by my spiritual playmate(s) - KC & CA
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Dear friends... I am looking for a home to rent with lots of light and open floor plan with spacious rooms in or around the Asheville area. I am open to going as far as Waynesville or Black Mountain. I adore living in Asheville but have a spiritual community in Waynesville, and LOVE the Light Center in Black Mountain.I need space for myself, my youngest daughter, when she is home from college, a meditation/healing/music room, and in a peaceful, private setting where I can create a beautiful healing oasis for myself and my clients..I would like to find something under $1000 a month, but would consider higher for the right place. It is important that I am in a location that is easy for my clients to find, and I would love to have a garden tub or large tub/jacuzzi combination. Being near water (stream/lake/waterfall) is nourishing to me, and a beautiful view of the mountains would be delightful!If you know of such a place available now or by the beginning of September, please let me know at 828 777 6688, or at mary@spiritsongoasis.com.Blessings, love and light... Spiritsong
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CONDITIONAL LOVE? AND A SEQUEL ...

© 2009 Howard McQueenWhat is this thing called conditional love?Does it compel us toward or draw us away from UNconditional love?Oh!As in “I will love you if YOU…”• change yourself (for me)• drop your addictions (for me)• believe what I believe• drop being so critical• open up to life• make my life smoother• help heal our relationship gone astray (so I won't have to do all the work - poor me)• make better grades in school (so I will know I am a “successful” parent, or …)and so on ...Well now, if I am practicing this conditional love,It seems to me that I am engaged in1) manipulating someone else using and abusing the name of loveAnd/or2) dishonoring my own integrity by not being true to love of selfHmmmmmm. More weeds that I am needing to tend to!Welcome to the work of tending to the fertile garden, nourished by your soul.You as gardener are also steward and this is your landscape, the fruits and/or neglect of which you manifest into the outer world.Your Inner Housekeeping - Yes.Your work of UpRooting - For sure.This is the work set aside for us to under-take.~ .. ~Now that I am aware of this conditional love, I cease and desist, I stop – Cold Turkey!I step into my internal integrity, without blame or shame, and without hiding out, re-engage and more fully receive my own love and respect for self and Self, then reaffirm this in my relationship and actions and intent with all life, all forms of life and all energies of life.A blessing may help in receiving and keeping this promise and agreement close to my/your/our vest.Know at your innermost and cellular level that you are THE precious Child of Creation. You are unconditionally loved before your conception, you are unconditionally loved throughout your stay on this earth (as you encounter the full spectrum of current human conditions), AND you will are welcomed back into unconditional love at your death. This Love is outside of time and space and is Omnipotent as well as Unconditional. Know this, accept this, be changed by this. Let this be your only clothing. Go forth and love life and live the prophecy that will cultivate your love of life with your community, and share this message for those desiring to be re-imagined anew.. Be not afraid to risk it all, for what may emerge is astounding, and only a hint, just a taste of the rapture.*****Conditional love: Sequel© 2009 Howard McQueenWaves of reconnection to being true to myself continue to wash over me, allowing me to see conflict – witness it from within, feel into it, and know it as judgment, aka resistance-to-life, aka conditions that obscure and distort love.I release all multi-dimensional attachments to this conditional love,and unconditionally open to healing from withinAnd allow my integrity to spread outward to my relationships with all of life.Were I to put on the garb of the labels of being religious or spiritual,I would in this moment request baptism.I would in this moment enlist in SeminaryI would in this moment join a wandering Buddhist troupe.These are all well established paths, most leading to a life well lived.In this moment, I choose to step off all paths,to live the unique and radical life.In this moment, I give my life to that which is radical, exemplified in the spirit of fiercely loving life and defending life, in the name of all the true named and nameless mystics-prophets, past, present and future.I stand in awe of life, humbledwith laugher bubbling up quite oftenAt the delusionAnd the follyof what I once drank fromthinking it would open my heart, nourish my soul.Rooting out this ignorance and fear, this is joyful.Know that there has been much to let go.I am a simpler, humble foolI’ve stumbled upon the obscured artifact, “letting life be”, in my remembering to be free of judgment.I am seeing and sensing a more profound unity in everything, even amidst all the surface stress.I join the ranks of many others holding the Space, holding the Signal, for unconditional love to flourish.… Yipes … & …………. Yippee!***
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